Have you ever found yourself lost in a dream, only to awaken to a harsh reality that leaves you longing for something more? As a former worship pastor, I've experienced this dichotomy firsthand. Join me as I share my reflections on the view from the pew and what I pray for the future of the church.
THE DREAM
From an early age, I knew what I wanted to do with my life. When asked at eighteen years old what I wanted my life to look like, my response was, "I will be the worship pastor at a megachurch by the time I am 30." Ambitious? Yes. Naive? Probably. Stupid? No doubt. But I was convinced that God had called me to a life of ministry and that nothing could stop me from achieving my dream. So, when that dream came true, I thought I had made it. I had arrived. I had found my purpose and was living the dream.
I quickly realized, however, that the dream was not all I had hoped it would be. The reality of ministry was far from my expectations. It was filled with long hours, constant criticism, and a never-ending cycle of meetings. I found myself running on empty, pouring out my heart and soul week after week, only to be met with unrealistic expectations, impossible demands, and harsh criticism. After twenty-five years of ministry, and thirteen at the highest level, I was tired, disillusioned, and ready for a change. The dream had become a nightmare, and I wondered if it was time to wake up.
Then it was all over. In an instant, my whole life changed. Although I didn’t see it coming and never expected my ministry and career to end without warning, it turned out to be the best thing that has ever happened to me. The clarity that comes from finding yourself at the end of yourself…with nothing but Jesus…is the ironic secret of success. I wish many more church staff members could have this same awakening while still in positions of ministry leadership, but unfortunately, all too often the fog of ministry blinds us to this reality.
Reality is like a cold shower on a winter morning – jolting and eye-opening. I've seen the cracks in the facade of the church: ego battles disguised as theological debates, empty rituals masquerading as genuine worship, and power struggles overshadowing true service. The expectations put on leaders can be suffocating at times; perfection becomes the unreachable standard, vulnerability feels like weakness, and authenticity gets lost in the pursuit of appearances.
Navigating through this reality can be disheartening but also enlightening. It reveals where we need reformation – not just superficial changes but a deep transformation of hearts and minds. Embracing humility, prioritizing compassion over correctness, and fostering inclusivity are crucial steps toward building an authentic community that reflects the essence of faith.
THE VIEW
For the last few months, I’ve been attending different churches. For the first time in my life, I have been able to choose where and/or if I go to church. As I sit in the pew, my perspective is shifting…no longer leading from the stage but observing from a different vantage point.
Too many church staff members have been “professional Christians” for so long they don’t truly understand what it’s like to be in the pew. The deep heartache some bring through the doors…questions about the goodness of God…or even the existence of God. The anxiety one experiences just walking through the doors of the church - on top of the anxiety he or she has been dealing with all through the week – it’s almost too much to handle.
From my new perspective, I’m learning there is a vast chasm between the stage and the congregation. As the worship leaders begin singing, most of the congregation stands and watches rather than joins in – maybe it’s because they don’t know the songs, or the key is too high, or the lyrics are difficult to spit out. Perhaps it’s because it is blatantly obvious the singers are more concerned about sounding good, having the right amount of energy, and looking relevant than they are about truly understanding what congregational worship is. Honestly, I’m not sure if it is one of those, all of those, or more…but something is missing.
And then we consider the preaching and teaching. From the pew, it certainly feels as if many pastors care more about their Instagram feeds and podcast views than truly connecting with the hurting people sitting in front of them. Messages are good… well-worded and crafted…yet somehow, they don’t seem to connect with people on a heart level. The truth is that these messages will only make it as far as the exit doors, or maybe the parking lot. Most of the people in the room have not experienced true life change, communed with their Creator in worship, or made real connections with other people.
The lights are impressive. The LED screens are huge. The haze, sound system, and transitions are all flawlessly executed. The singers jump and cheer and sing better than many professional artists. The parking lot flows well, the ushers perform their duties with excellence, and the building is decorated like a four-star hotel. But it all seems empty. The whole experience seems shallow and missing something real. Is this all there is? Is this really what God wants for his local church? Have we missed something significant in our never-ending journey toward excellence, relevance, and making a name for ourselves?
THE PRAYER
As I reflect on my journey as a worship pastor, navigating through the highs and lows of ministry, one thing remains constant - my genuine desire to see reformation within the Church. My heart longs for a revival that goes beyond mere traditions and rituals, but one that truly transforms lives. I pray for a church where authenticity reigns supreme, where we can come as we are without fear of judgment or hypocrisy. A place where vulnerability is embraced, and love abounds unconditionally.
The Church I long for is one marked by broken people living in a broken world, bringing a broken sacrifice of praise. Most likely this means it’s not perfect, it isn’t neat and contained, and it isn’t what is happening in the churches I’ve been a part of. You see, for broken people to offer themselves in sacrificial worship we have to be willing to accept it will be messy, complicated, and imperfect…and maybe, just maybe….this starts on the stage rather than in the pew.
May the future church be characterized by unity in diversity, embracing different perspectives and backgrounds while standing firm on the foundation of faith. May the future church be recognized as a place for broken people to find hope…not just a good show. May future church leaders not be so removed from reality that they don’t understand how to genuinely love and connect with “regular” people. May future worship leaders care more about helping the congregation connect with God through brokenness and tears than singing the newest songs. May future pastors care more about demonstrating the qualities of Jesus – humility, servanthood, quiet leadership, and pursuing the Father – than they do about the number of followers they have on Instagram or last Sunday’s attendance numbers.
Above all, my prayer is for a revival of passion and zeal for Jesus - not just in our words or songs but in our actions and deeds. May we be known not by our eloquence or performance but by our love for one another. And so, with hopeful anticipation and unwavering faith, I entrust these prayers to the One who holds the future of His Church in His hands. May we continue to press on towards true reformation, guided by grace and fueled by love.
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